Sorry about that Chief

Ok I get the point.... I need to be more regular with this... forgive my tardiness, my absentia, my lack of general all-round respect and stuff... unforgivable really but hey! Wait'll ya hear what I've been up to! (Then you won't kick me out of the gang or make me sing the Froggie Song or any of that malarky hehehe... speaking of which... can you believe a certain friend of ours, who shall hereby be known as Jet tried to make me sing the Froggie Song by writing in our visitors book at home that I was out of the gang... unbefuckinglievable I say!! - Needless to say it didn't work at all at all but chukkas to her for giving it her best shot, the cheeky little minx!)

But first... check out these Jellyfish eh? The one above us is a Blueblubber Jellyfish... gorgeous innit? All frilly like and stuff... but don't you worry little chickadee's I have loads more lovely pictures of completely lickable jellyfish to amaze and delight you... like these little suckers here - now I know you're thinking 'Cor blimey - MORE Sea Nettles! What's she like then eh??' but just LOOK at 'em!! Bleedin' magnificent they are... totally floaty, utterly venomous, completely devoid of anything other than the whole jellyfish 'just floating along, waiting to sting things, and just sort of hang around, possibly feeding on plankton and stuff but I'm not really sure' thing... you know. Cool really I rection :-)

THIS WEEK'S PUZZLER:

On January 31, 1974, this legendary Hollywood personality died at age 95. The producer of such classic films as "The Best Years of Our Lives" and"Wuthering Heights," he's now best known for his fractured English, which produced inspired examples of "inadvertent oxymoronica" including this remark about Cary Grant:

"We pay him too much, but he's worth it."

Who said this?

And while you're thinking about that one, here's a picture of a Chiron Jellyfish - looks cool sorta like a little cupcake with tentacles (although come to think of it a cupcake made out of gelatine... ew how gross!)

Ok so basically LOADS of stuff's been happening since I last entered a post on this bloggermewhatsit thingamajiggy - Big Day Out for starters! Oh man!!! I so loved it... totally, completely, utterly, unashamedly LOVED ITS GUTS!!!!!!!!!

Iggy and the Stooges!!! But wait, I'm getting all excited and all ahead of myself... calm down, slooooow down, deep breaths, aaaaaaaaaaaah.

Ok so I went to the Gold Coast Big Day Out for the first time last sunday - it was alot of fun :-) I so loved it - way better set up than the Adelaide Big Day Out at Wayville - no bottlenecking as you go from stage to stage - so basically they are able to have a crowd 3 times the size with none of the problems - 90 000 people and all the stages aside from the 2 main stages are in these muhassive big tents and everything was very open plan. But enough of this I may speak further about the BDO at a later point. Basically I needed a day to recover as it is held on a sunday up here, so last monday I took off work... and big fuck off chicken me has STILL not broken up with her boyfriend.

I feel so horrible about it, he is totally aware of what's going on, I just can't find the right time to do it ya know??!! Anyways so I've been utterly miserable and moping around like a total dickhead - I have seriously watched about a squillion movies in the last 10 days - all I wanna do is sit around and detach from the world - it's not just that I can't find the right moment and the balls to do it, it's also partly that I'm scared I'm making the wrong decision, as well as HATING the idea of hurting such a nice guy, plus also it's really easy to spend time around him when there's other people.... all of that (and more) but GET THIS!!!!! Last night when I said to him 'ok I'll come to your house on tuesday and we'll have a bit of a chat about the state of the nation' (my totally chickenshit way of letting him know we have to talk about stuff) he said to me 'I know what's coming'

!!!!!!!!

I KNOW WHAT'S COMING!!!!!!!!

So basically he knows. He probably has for ages, and I've been EATING MY HEART OUT, and moping around like a twat, and putting it off, and listening to the goddamn SMITHS for chrissakes, (not to mention Nick Cave and PJ Harvey) and feeling likea bitch and total rubbish for WEEKS and he totally knows what's going on!!!

Has he tried to talk to me about it?

No

Has he tried to answer my probing questions when I ask him how does he FEEL about things??

No

Well anyways, tomorrow is D day. No more putting anything off. No more hiding stuff or anything like that - the way he said it broke my heart... I said to him 'What's coming then sweet?' and he dodged the question like the true professional he is, plastered on his biggest, brightest smile, gave me a kiss and walked out the door.

*sigh*

That man has an absolute ocean of grief inside him. It's a part of the problem. It's part of what is holding him back and forcing him into this unnatural stasis where he is suspended in the space-time continuum like some molecule of matter/antimatter and just hangs there immoving (hey technically I know that's a totally incorrect analogy as matter and antimatter - in fact all matter - is vibrating but I'm on a roll here so I don't want any complaints from the purists or the 'real nerds' - and you know who you are - ok??)

Anyway the point is moot isn't it? Plus I'm certainly no therapist... crikey I feel like I need one though! Gawd there must be summat very wrong with me, I'm never happy with what I've got... and sometimes what I've got is pretty fab! Regardless, I did not become the frantic, frenetic, fearless and fucked up person that I am today by ignoring those gut instincts!! So, tomorrow my darling boy gets the 'welcome to dumpsville - population YOU' card' - as suggested by the magnificently marvellous mermaidgrrrl at our Hottest 100 Australia Day bbq last thursday. Well, figuratively speaking of course!

Speaking of last thursday, man what a fantastic time we had - but I'll tell you more about that later too... today's been pretty frantic as I'm training the new permanent receptionist here (et voila! all of a sudden the world's most BORING temp job in the world suddenly gets not only way more interesting but shedloads busier as well!!)

And now - before I go - here's a lovely little swarm of Aurelia Jellyfish to keep you marvelling at the natural world!!! Oooooo look at the little suckers go!!!!